He who blames, thinks he is alone, but isn't.

The challenge comes not in circumstance but in thinking we are alone.

"For he who blames, thinks he is alone, but isn't."

When we fear, we blame and it is in blaming that we miss the mark, thinking we are alone. What is there to react to but this belief that we are separate and therefore alone, that creates the world into believing there is much to fear and that love must be compromised because of circumstance? For this reason, the world was created. It is out of duality that we remember our roots and desire non-separateness; however, because of fear, we often multiply illusions for a time. It is in not reacting but believing in the source of All-that-is, that we overcome circumstance and bring each other home: to heaven, where we are in peace and unafraid, where limitless spirit comes and awaken us.

It is in this that the seeds of being are sown. In being, we are full of spirit; we trust, we have grace, we forgive, comfort, heal and bless. Through this, all things are possible; the grandeur of God, comes to inspire and create beautiful things. Although much tension and angst may be created in the process of undoing ourselves from blame, the projection of guilt, the practice is in trusting that through a higher intelligence, all things are possible. We are never alone.

What happens oftentimes is resistance to circumstance, doubt and fear. The fear is of thinking we are separate and alone. With circumstances to overcome, we often grow bitter because of this belief. The projection of guilt, we have been taught, is the means of salvation and therefore, warranted to be the correction of all error. While we do this, we hurt ourselves. It is our inherent goodness that we trust and know that, as stated in Course in Miracles, "there is nothing to fear."

To overcome challenges, one must see through to the heart and forgive. Also, one must trust: "there is nothing to fear." I am never alone. There is a way through the madness, other than to retaliate, blame and project guilt.

Perspective: How to treat and forgive a little "brat"

This came through in my wonder of how to treat my little "bratty" nephew. :) Opportunity knocks!

Teach by example and that is all

The cultivation of patience, tolerance, trust, honesty, gentleness and even joy are all personal matters. One can not learn on matters of the heart, without experience or wonder. Therefore, when teaching children, it is unnecessary to freight. Naturally, the child becomes curious when looked upon with wonder rather than intolerance and impatience. It is intolerant to believe one should listen without explanation nor should they have to listen by control, obedience or law alone. For what is taught is mostly taught by example and so the greatest force you can contribute to this world is in the practice of attaining Truth within yourself, not outside.

One may teach Truth, but often we all are to degrees. Not without fear is it intermixed, that the Truth gets watered down, confusing, befumbling to those whom receive. The best thing to do is to be an example. In being an example, one is more likely to discern within their mind and without words, accept with gentle eyes. With the compassion and love that replaces all fear, does the "teacher" transmit to her child and even to those whom aren't, the love of Creation.

One may wonder when enough is enough. The child says "No" and demands respect and yet, does not know how to give it. However often, they are treated as little, when in fact, the Truth is in them,as it is in all. Many or most, do not see themselves in the child nor would they proclaim to be as little as the child. However, in reality, the child is them, some parts of which suppressed and denied; they grow angry and bitter without peace of mind.

Everything is a manifestation of something more deeply rooted than the superficial. The "problem" is often not the issue but the symptom of something greater and in need of healing. Thus, while the gentle eyes of compassion and warmth are the rarest gifts of humankind, the child may bring up the wound within the healer/parent/teacher and therefore, be the the medicine to a much greater awareness of themselves. The challenge, of course, is in accepting the gift, the moment of challenge and confrontation, as an opportunity to work on Self rather than on another. What often happens, however, is that intolerance and impatience are fed, the wound doesn't heal, and punishment or guilt is transmitted instead.

The cultivation of Spirit is not in preaching, but by sharing experiences and being an example. If intolerance, impatience and neglect are felt, if meanness is transmitted from child to parent or teacher or healer, the question to ask is how one might do this within themselves.

How might I improve the quality of intolerance and impatience within myself?
What do I need when I am being intolerant, impatient and mean?
What would I like from others when I am feeling intolerant, impatient and mean?

To die is to love

"I seek but what belongs to me in truth. And joy and peace are my inheritance."
Course in Miracles

To seek for what belongs to us in truth is to constantly be moving in the direction of joy, peace and happiness. By means of focusing on joy, peace and happiness in all that we do, we can measure how connected we are to the Infinite Source within ourselves. Joy, peace and happiness are our inherent gifts; since we are all children of God, we all have the capacity, regardless of circumstance, to overcome challenges.

It may be the case at times that we do not seem to realize that it is joy, peace or happiness we are moving toward. While it is what we all want, obstacles and challenges occur that make living love seem difficult. Little do we know that when this occurs, it is often because rather than life, we seek death instead.

The paradox of life is that death is a part of life. To desire the death of the false self is to love and to love is to be constantly moving in the direction of peace, joy and happiness. We are often unconscious of the death that we seek however. For this reason, death causes more angst and suffering, making it more difficult to realize or overcome the challenge. With this said, we can portend that death is a prerequisite to love; however if unaware, we are more likely to prolong our death. By holding on to the body, at the cost of the spirit, we fall asleep to purpose, which is constantly moving us in the direction of love. Thus, the death of the false self lingers on when one is unaware that the spirit, regardless of how things may look on the physical level, is constantly moving us in the direction of Truth- happiness, joy and peace.

Death is a necessary product of life. While there is just one physical death, the reality is that the death of the false self, the ego, is what evolves us. It is required in order to increase our capacity to love. Many people choose to numb, suppress and deny the death of their false self and for this reason, live a slow death of the body, with less joy and happiness for them to access. One can say that the more deaths one is willing to bear, the greater the capacity to love- the more joy, peace and happiness is available. Faith and trust in an Infinite Source is paramount to moving forward; while spirit is stronger and more aware of itself as Infinite potential, the body is dense and constantly in need of reminders. If one does not seek to replenish their spirit because of fear, the body is more likely to become forgetful, becoming more dense and depleting.

Spiritual growth and development, ultimately is about learning how to be in the unknown and accept life's challenges rather than resist them. One can therefore say that the greater the trust, the deeper our capacity to live love. Thus, our challenges and obstacles at living love is constantly confronting and therefore strengthening our faith- our belief in Spirit, the Truth of who we are.

When obstacles to growth and challenges occur, it is most beneficial to know that the necessary outcome is more Truth, more trust in ourselves, as a part of Infinite Source. It is best to focus on the outcome of what One can learn than to dwell in death, to acknowledge the challenge as a necessary death, but to focus on the spiritual qualities that are being derived from the experience.

This is how we evolve and grow spiritually.

A Message To All My Fellow Spiritual Warriors of Love: A note to take heed in difficult times

"Unreal love is another name for attachment, real love is very detachful" OsHo

(Tantra can be described as the Spiritual Warriors recognition of his/her ability to embrace love in a world that is constantly reacting out of fear)

Unreal love is compensatory. Real love is unconditional.
Unreal love seeks to be seen. Real love sees and therefore gives with compassion and pleasure, without expectation.
Without the healing of vision, real love does not manifest in form to its pure extent possible (with little or no fear).

Real love manifests in form when vision has been restored and fear has been replaced with the courage and the willingness of the Spiritual Warrior.

This is a process and an undoing.

Take heed.


Sometimes it is difficult to be real, unconditional love. There is sorrow and pain and discomfort. There is a lot of uncertainty in whether a person or people will love in return. There is still a great deal of fear.

In form, we all yearn to experience real love but many if not most of the world has been operating on a different variety of love called, emotional love. Emotional love is special love, as talked about in Course in Miracles; it is the kind of love we yearn for to get our emotional needs met, to hide our emotional wounds rather than uncover them so they heal. Emotional love is wounded love, in need of healing but in search of compromise and distractions. Real love, on the other hand, is transformational; it allows in love from the divine. The reason why so many people have not awakened to real love is because they have not fully allowed it in and because they have not yet experienced it in its purity through the body. For this reason, it is extra work, at times, to manifest real love within relationship and within ourselves. Any attempt at embodying real, unconditional love may feel difficult at times because it is, in fact, quite foreign to the body.


When one's restoration of sight is still in process, the heart is left tender oftentimes. It is vulnerable still to fear. The truth carries on in an open-hearted person because the person who stays open-hearted in love is manifesting more divine love to overcome the fear; however, much of this divine love is not yet fully received or acknowledged. Thus, the spiritual warrior struggles at times and even doubts whether she/he is even capable for the task. The fear can be paralyzing and so may leave the warrior in a rather short or long-term spiritual depression.

The fear can draw sickness and many kinds of death, all of which are for the disillusionment of the ego. The more disenchanted the ego, the more real love can manifest safely. The word "safely" is used because it is the death of fear and shame that creates sanity (love). It is the holding on of it that creates its opposite.

Thus, however, long the journey may seem, however difficult the ego may grasp, what is required is the letting go of the ego, the fear, the shame, the loneliness and even the depression.

To move further, from darkness to light, one must stay strong, committed and trust. They must be vigilant in their belief of an unconditional presence and love. Integrating light, to all degrees necessary, the advent of Truth allows peace and wisdom to shine through and heal the Warrior. It is through peace of mind and Love's eternal presence, felt through the body, that the Spiritual Warrior of Love is dependent and must remain open to. This presence is what gives the Warrior more courage to answer Love's call. This call is always moving the warrior toward wholeness/destiny.

Take heed.
Stay vigilant.
Be courageous to Love Self and Others.
Let go.
Trust.

THE GIFT OF SHAME

The gift of shame.

One would not think to realize that the gift of shame is great. Offering awareness of what has been hidden, the gift of shame offers us an opportunity to undo. To undo is to forgive; however many think that undoing is to be done with or complete.

To the contrary, undoing has little to do with how things look and more to do with the heart. Atonement, another word for undoing, is about clearing the air, the clouds of perception that block our ability to forgive and move forward. When we forgive that which shames us, when we forgive ourselves for the contribution that we make to the suffering of the world, we are more likely to make choices that are more holistic, unified and in the direction of love. In other words, it is learning how to forgive and love ourselves and each other unconditionally, that we are more apt to be citizens of change, trees that bear fruit and nourish the soil and our souls.

Acknowledging shame can be rather difficult for many and this is why is it a narrow road many do not think to travel. It is important to know that shame and fear are never absent within us but hidden in dark corners, which we choose to ignore oftentimes. For good reason, the shame we hide manifests as tendencies, habits and addictions.

Many do not realize (or consider) that their inability to confront shame is a result of many of their challenges, habits and addictions. A good reason, however, not to be blamed, is that we have not been brought up with the proper tools to alleviate the shame and fear that we all so desperately seek, albeit unconsciously.
While the gift of shame is an opportunity to build being- such as forgiveness, trust, faith, self-love, and compassion, many if not most of us were taught to focus rather on doing, manifesting, and creating.

A good question to ask in this case is, "Who is doing the creating?" Is it an ego that lives on fear and shame or an ego whose mind is directed toward God or Love? Some may contend that God is something to fear and that our shaming is our salvation from God. At the root of all of our undoing, lies this belief.

Thus, to become a creator of miracles, to become a bearer of light, purification is necessary and that purification lies not in shaming our shame or being perfect. Rather in acknowledging shame, we are offered an opportunity to forgive, to trust, and to build being.

It is in building being that we catalyze change.

Shining light on sexual repression: A return to Innocence

The innocent are on a different ground than that of the battlefield. The battlefield for many is full of contradiction, war and hate. Underneath it at the root is deeply embedded shame and fear passed on from generations. For the innocent however, the battleground is more like a playground. The playground might look the same as the battle ground to many; however the innocent are brought to higher heights of awareness that leaves them curious, tender and compassionate. Thus what looks to be a battleground is intermixed with opportunities that abound, flashes of light that those at war can not see.

The less pure of heart, clouded with shame and fear, therefore may look upon the innocent with shaming eyes. They do not want to leave their battleground and so keep fighting- suppressing and denying the true nature of their Source. Any realization to them that their battleground is nothing more than a playground, when they raise their awareness, leaves them ashamed and in fear, for why would they fight if this were true? Resentment fills the repressed, especially the sexually repressed. Resentment, anger and a lot of projection are full of the sexually repressed. They do not know what to do with their attacking thoughts and because society looks upon them with judging eyes, they sit on their anger and don't get up.

The sexually repressed do not budge until they are willing to heal, which entails a letting go of limiting beliefs. Until then, they sit and sit and sit with their limiting beliefs, stuffing what only gets bigger when they get up. The sexually repressed are never relaxed therefore. They are constantly doing things to make up for their discomfort and are consistently on guard and ready to fight.

When the innocent comes to greet them, they turn away very quickly. What they see in the innocent is themselves, but pure, sensual, and light. Feelings arise within seeing them much long forgotten.

When someone is pure of heart, we can no longer repress our anger, our shame and fear. When the innocent come forth, more light comes into the impure to be brought to awareness and healed. However, because so much has been repressed, the mind begins to fill even more with sex, shame and fear. This is the case for many individuals who are or have been sexually abused.

For healing to occur, the sexually repressed must be seen in us all. In shades of grey, to some degree, we all have denied and repressed the shame and fear of being a sexual and sensual being. For sexual repression does not just impact our limiting views and beliefs about sex, but even more, it impacts our relationship we have with ourselves about how much we can create, that is bring light, in the world. Sexual repression is seen is most facades of life as the polarity of belief in what it means to be a man and a woman, what it means to be in relationship and what it means to love. When we can love the shame and confront the fear, when we can integrate love into our shadowy thoughts, the light of the innocent, that is, the light of God, shines more fully in ourselves. It is in uncovering the layers of fear and shame, peeling back the old, that we can uncover what has always been- the purity of the soul.

In seeing the purity of our soul, we become powerful, courageous and full of light.

It is a process, an undoing, and a healing that we obtain the courage to love.

May we all be powerful, courageous and in love.

Emotional Sex and the Special Love Relationship

The thing about emotional sex is that it doesn't last long before the will desires something else. The will of a strong ego thrives on emotions and sex to it is like a tendency or habit that keeps it thirsty for more emotion- more thrill, more passion, more "specialness." The ego, because it has not learned how to meet its own needs, to see itself as the source of love, likes to delude itself in specialness from the outside. Sex is just one of many ways that the ego deludes itself to feel loved and while some sort of release may often be required for it to move forward from its loathing, it can't get enough until it learns that healing is required.

The healing that is required IS love, however Self-love is the true remedy. Self-love redeems, while emotional sex offers a temporary fix for the remedy. Many of our brothers and sisters do not move from this place of emotional sex, which is often requited of emotional love or the special relationship as written about in Course in Miracles.

The special relationship, emotional sex, and emotional love, often go hand-in-hand and all are because one has imagined needs, thoughts believed to bring end to suffering. The suffering, unbeknownst to many, comes from one root cause however; this suffering stems from the belief that we are separate from God.

Because the beliefs of separation and fear leave us oftentimes in negative, low-vibratory emotions, we see no way out, but through sex, habits and tendencies that we hide in ourselves and in each other. While there is in fact an unconditional force of love called the Universe, it is often not felt or experienced due to the low-vibratory emotions one emits. The seemingly "fixed" point of view that creates the emotion, leaves one unreceptive to the Unconditional Love of God that is present. This love is the true love that heals, while all else are quick-fixes to the remedy. Thus, until one becomes more aware of their emotions and begins to believe that they are holy loved and supported by the universe, the special love relationship and the emotional sex that comes with it will continue to proffer as substitutes.

Emotional sex and the special love relationship is neither "wrong" nor "right;" most of us benefit to some degree and we all eventually learn. However, emotional sex and the special love relationship can often be painful, beset with hidden agendas, unrealized expectations, guilt and shame. It is important to realize that there is, in fact, a way out of our suffering and this way out is through the unconditional love of Self and "other." While one may yearn to experience this love in the body through another body, one must oftentimes be the source of this love for its creation to be experienced. The meeting of a holy relationship, for which healing and Self-love are present, may seemingly take a long time, that the undoing of the special love relationship may seem like a trap. However, this is what it means to be on the "leading edge of thought." Built on faith alone, it means to become the source of love, directly connected to the Source itself, through our intention and commitment in bringing conscious love, that is Self-love to the world, often without evidence of return.

Emotions do not exclude a more conscious, self-loving relationship. Within a conscious love relationship, emotions offer and even enhance one's relationship to God. As opposed to the special love relationship, however, the conscious love relationship starts with Self-love. Because Self-love is present, it brings emotions of devotion and reverence, without shame or guilt, or giving-to-get. The conscious love relationship is a higher form of love, with the intention to bring unconditional love to it; sex, is one expression of this reverence.

As opposed to the blame, shame and disrespect that may form through emotional sex and the need to feel special, conscious love relationships brings emotions that are purely loving and with a loving intent. The fear behind not getting is an indication of the special love relationship.

While the special love relationship and emotional sex is mostly a thing we are born into, perpetuating itself through limiting beliefs and thoughts, the faith to move forward is the willingness to transform each special love relationship into a holy one. This means to remove fear from relationship, to take responsibility for and learn how to communicate pain without blame or shame. As sourced in Course in Miracles,

"The Holy Spirit knows no one is special. Yet He also perceived that you have made special relationships, which He would purify and not let you destroy. However unholy the reason you made them may be, He can translate them into holiness by removing as much fear as you let Him."

Thus, let us not make wrong or bad the longing for passionate and emotional sex, but see it for what it is: oftentimes, a need to feel loved and special. Let us integrate within ourselves Self-love and healing and raise each other up from our negative emotions to see the light of day.

May all desire and need to feel special be transformed into a more intimate relationship within ourselves, a conscious love.
May we transform all special, love relationships, giving to get, into pure love, giving as receiving.
May we have the integrity not to make guilty but see things for what they are.
May all special love relationships become holy, marked with respect and reverence for ourselves and each other.