Relationship: Evolving from negative thinking

Does it seem that, generally, we tend to meet people where they are at by agreeing or conforming, at least for a short time, to the ways of partner/friend/comrade. Somewhere within our being there is a deep desire to connect and be met, acknowledged and loved by people around us and yet, not all the time, do we really agree or feel similarly to "other." Sometimes negativity, disagreement, and unsettled feelings seem to happen more often than good times. So we come at odds, struggling within ourselves and within our relationships.

Our ability to evolve is dependent on seeing healthy mirrors and spending time alone. When one is around negativity, then another may pick up that negatively and carry it with them until they actively clear it. For this reason , some relationships that were once close will want to be reevaluated. If there are relationships that drain our energy, we will want to consider how this investment costs us and how it benefits us.

For the evolutionary, on the path to higher consciousness, which I believe is toward conscious, unconditional love, there are good questions to consider when choosing to spend time with people.

What mirrors do I want to attract? What agreement/contract have I made to attract the relationships I am in?
Do I feel empowered in these relationships? How can I create an empowering relationship between us, so that we evolve each other, spiritually grow and develop?
How much time on earth am I willing to spend, living in a disempowered reality?
How often and how much can I presence love, without defense or need to be "right?"
How much can I love myself in the presence of this particular person/mirror?
Do I feel at one with myself in the presence of this perceived "other?"
Does our relationship feed separation or oneness?
Is there still learning and growing to do in this relationship?
What is working? What isn't working in this relationship?
What does this relationship have to teach me about myself?

There is great deal of us who fall into the category of negative thinking. It is not that we are negative, but there is a seed within us that we have been watering for lifetimes; that is, our ego. Without conscious awareness to perceive the ego's grip, to be right, special, superior, justified, we believe we are doing good by telling what is "wrong" in the world, ourselves, and each other. What often happens is that we tend to agree with negativity, through feeling sorry for the "other" and justifying their feelings as acceptable or through taking on their energy kinistetically. When we do this, what we actually do is create and attract more "wrong" in our life, perpetuating fear and emotional turmoils that strengthen the already existing separate mentality.

Because we are becoming more sensitive to subtler energies/realities, we want to make sure that we are feeding light and love and not negativity and fear. Therefore, it is important to learn to separate from negative energy. This can be done without blame, as everyone is a mirror and every moment can be an opportunity to practice, learn about ourselves, and heal.

One thing to consider is psychic regeneration and the subtle body. In kundalini yoga, we studied that there are actually 10 bodies, 6 bodies of which are subtle or etheric. These subtle bodies more greatly impact and effect our physical body, which is all that we see, our perception of reality. The view of reality, in which, we see, often masks our true identity; they are made up of visual imprints learned or conditioned throughout lifetimes. We can know our view of reality by looking at what is happening in present time, what we see projected outside of ourselves. With awareness, we can work to strengthen the subtle bodies and clear space within these realms, so that we can live from our true identity, as one.

The space that is required may be temporary but necessary for psychic regeneration to occur. Without this regeneration of the etheric or subtle realms, it becomes more difficult to love, like a fog has come over. Perhaps, all one needs to clear the air/space within relationship is time apart. While within established relationships, we want to continue growing and developing ourselves together and we care about the "other," we also need to listen to ourselves. If we don't take the space we need to regenerate, integrate what we are learning, and restore our life force energy, we become a breeding ground for negativity.

Therefore, as much as possible, spend time alone and in the accompaniment of clean, friendly, creative, loving mirrors- however that looks.