Tuesday, April 27, 2010

The Humble Pie: Staying vulnerable

The Humble Pie.

It is awesome how I ask the universe for something and then there it is, ready for me to see if I am really ready for the challenge. On my vision album I pasted a girl lookin' crazy with a big gap in between her teeth, smiling really big, along with a design of a funny face made out of vegetables. On the page I wrote, "Self Expression" and "Embracing Humility." "I am playful. I am light-hearted. I am free."

I realize that writing about the transformational process of emotions has to include breakdowns and breakthroughs, as well as humility on my part. This leaves me feeling vulnerable and it is scary because others' might use information against me and what if I get hurt. Another thing that comes up is that I do not wish to energize or create a self-perpetuating fear by sharing what my insecurities are.

However, if transformation is what I am up to then there is nothing else to be but authentic about my experience and raw with my emotion. Right? Sounds good, because whoever stays in my life will be those that are my friends. They will resonate with me and they will be the strongest reflection of how I want to see myself and others, as love. They will resonate with me because in some part they will see a piece of themselves and I will see a piece of myself within them.

For those that wish to use my vulnerabilities against me, then it is a practice of love- self-love, for in them, I get to see the part of myself that rejects who I am and makes it easy therefore to reject and judge others.

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